I recently found myself in a situation where I felt my partner showed no interest in what I was trying to achieve. Whenever I raised an issue, he didn’t attempt to address it and instead just did not respond, literally. There was one particular incident when things had gotten bad with the business, I was stressed and in need of re-assurance. However when I shared what had happened with him, he remained silent. No words of encouragement were provided, besides the fact that this shows lack of manners, I came to the realisation that he didn't take what I was doing seriously. His approach made me angry and that anger is my motivation.
I am sure many other entrepreneurs find themselves in a similar place particularly when starting out. While I will not comment on specifics of why this man is perhaps not worth your time, I will share some tips with you, which I hope will help you deal with a similar situation.
1. Put yourself and your goals first
It is important to remember that you are the most important person there is and you have to put yourself first. Your partner’s lack of interest has clearly demonstrated to you that you are on your own. He is not there for you and instead of hoping that he may change or feeling let down and less motivated, use it to drive yourself forward. When you are successful he will regret his actions and whatever success you have created is for you to enjoy. Don’t give him the satisfaction of a free ride.
2. Remember success is the best revenge
Success is definitely the best revenge. When your lifestyle improves, you get more recognised in your field of work and you progress ahead in life, people will want what you have. If you happen to have stayed in the relationship he may even feel like you should share the success with him but don’t feel you have to. You did it on your own and if he wants what you have then he needs to work for it for himself. It’s better for you to give to charity than for you to let your partner have it.
3. If he isn’t interested in giving you his time then you have even more time to work on your business
There is a positive here, if he genuinely wants to do as he pleases and not spend time with you, nor, listen to your problems, then you can simply keep things formal with him and instead use the extra time you have to do your own thing. If you have an office at home then instead of watching TV with him or feeling the need to keep him company, use your office to build your business and work on the things you need to.
4. Rely on your business partner if you have one to work through your trouble
Setting up a business is hard without a doubt. Doing it completely on your own is hard too and my experience is usually to have a business partner to do it with you, if you are lucky enough to find someone who shares the same vision and the same drive as you. Instead of feeling like you need to rely on your boyfriend / girlfriend / husband / wife to give the emotional support, share your issues with your business partner instead.
5. Use your anger
That anger and that energy you have is great. His lack of interest in your business is clearly him thinking that your business isn’t worth anything. For anyone that has worked hard day in and day out will know how angry this would make anyone feel, so use that anger and prove him wrong. As I said earlier when he sees improvements in your lifestyle, in you as a person he will regret his actions.
6. You may have to accept that you are on your own
The battle you fight for success is one that you fight on your own. You have to accept your partner isn’t on your side, he doesn’t have the same vision as you and he isn’t going to be there for you emotionally or intellectually. So accept it and fight the world on your own. Of course, if you have a business partner, as I do then both of you are fighting the battle together for your business but those dynamics are somewhat different.
If you truly want to succeed then you have to do whatever it takes. For you it may even mean leaving your partner if it’s affecting your business. Although there may be several other reasons you may have stuck it out with him but that is a decision you have to make for yourself.